Grief is not an illness, but rather a natural and necessary journey that follows the death of someone we love. As such, it deserves our attention and respect, as well as the support of others, if we are to heal. In this area, we offer practical direction and emotional support in better understanding the grieving process. Here you’ll learn about such topics as coping with serious illness, helping yourself with grief and helping others with grief.
Coping with Serious Illness
Learning that you or someone you love is seriously or terminally ill is a blow to everyone the news touches. If the onset of the illness was sudden or unexpected, you and the rest of your family will likely feel shock and numbness. This is a natural and necessary response to painful news.
You can only cope with this new reality in doses. You will first come to understand it with your head, and only over the weeks and even months to come will you begin to understand it with your heart.
The following brochures offer compassionate, practical suggestions for coping with serious or terminal illness:
- Helping Yourself Live When You Are Seriously Ill
- Helping Yourself Live When You Are Dying
- Helping a Friend Who is Seriously Ill
- Helping a Friend Who is Dying
- Helping Your Family When a Member is Seriously Ill
- Helping Your Family When a Member is Dying
- Helping a Child Who Has a Serious Illness
- Helping a Child Who is Dying
Helping Yourself with Grief
Someone you love has died. You are now faced with the difficult, but important need to mourn. Mourning is the open expression of your thoughts and feelings regarding the death and the person who died. It is an essential part of healing.
Express your grief openly. By sharing your grief outside yourself, healing occurs. Ignoring your grief won't make it go away; talking about it often makes you feel better. Find caring friends and relatives who will listen without judging. Avoid people who are critical or who try to steal your grief from you. You have a right to express your grief; no one has the right to take it away.
You are beginning a journey that is often frightening, painful, overwhelming and sometimes lonely. The following brochures provide many other practical suggestions to help you move toward healing in your unique grief journey.
- Helping Yourself Heal When Someone Dies
- Helping Yourself Heal When a Baby Dies
- Helping Yourself Heal When Your Child Dies
- Helping Yourself Heal When Your Spouse Dies
- Helping Yourself Heal When a Parent Dies
- Helping Yourself Heal During the Holiday Season
- Helping Your Family Cope When a Pet Dies
Helping Others With Grief
A friend has experienced the death of someone loved. How can you help? To begin with, you can be an active listener. Your physical presence and desire to listen without judging are your critical helping tools. Don't worry so much about what you will say. Just concentrate on listening to the words being shared with you.
You should also strive to be compassionate. Give your friend permission to express his or her feelings without fear of criticism. Allow him or her to experience all the hurt, sorrow and pain that he or she is feeling at the time. Enter into your friend's feelings, but never try to take them away.
The following brochures provide many other practical suggestions for helping others with grief:
- Helping a Friend in Grief
- Helping AIDS Survivors Heal
- Helping a Homicide Survivor Heal
- Helping SIDS Survivors Heal
- Helping a Suicide Survivor Heal
- Helping Children Cope with Grief
- Helping Teenagers Cope with Grief
- Helping Infants and Toddlers When Someone They Love Dies
- Helping Children with Funerals
- Helping Bereaved Siblings Heal
- Helping Grieving Children at School
Author of these Helping Series brochures, Dr. Alan Wolfelt is an internationally noted author, teacher and practicing clinical thanatologist. He serves as Director of the Center for Loss and Life Transition and is on the faculty at the University of Colorado Medical School's Department of Family Medicine. To get copies of these books, please call.
|
